If I must by Amy Lane ~ Book Review by PizzyGirl

IfIMustLGTitle: If I must

Author: Amy Lane

Publisher: Dreamspinner Press

Cover Artist: Catt Ford

Rating: 4.5 of 5 Stars

Publication Date: 12/01/2009

Length: Novel (~ 50K-100K)

Genre: Contemporary, Fiction, Gay Fiction, M/M Romance, Winter Holiday


Joel Martinez, a practical and organized computer programmer, is roommates with Ian Cooper, a certified IQ-in-the- stratosphere mathematical genius who literally can’t find his own underwear in the mess of his day-to-day life. When Joel uneasily leaves Ian for the holidays, he ends up telling stories to his sister and discovers he feels much more for Ian than he thought. So when Ian calls, distraught because the only other thing in his life that loves him (a half-feral cat named Manky Bastard) is going to have to be put down, Joel hurries back home hoping that opposites really do attract.

My View:

Though not quite a true Christmas story, it was more of a Thanksgiving leading up to Christmas story, this was still fantastic. I loved Ian and all his oddball quirks. I loved that from the get go you knew that he was not only mentally eccentric, he was also physically imperfect. But it was such a minor detail that you quickly forgot. I loved the way Ian was such a great character and really showcased Joel’s nurturing personality. For all of Ian’s flaws, Joel was his other half. And together they fit perfectly and made the best, oddest couple ever.


I loved how the story evolved so seamlessly. How Ian and Joel shifted from roommates, to friends, to more as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Through Joel’s stories and memories of Ian’s behaviors, it was really clear to see how much Joel and Ian loved one another, even if Joel couldn’t see it himself.


I totally didn’t see it coming that Joel thought he was straight. From the way he interacted with Ian from the get go, I just assumed he was gay. Yay for surprises and Yay for his wonderful and loving family who gentle broke the news to him that it was OK that he was gay.


Finally, I loved that Joel just rolled with it once he admitted his love for Ian was more than just friendship. That he did everything in his power to get back to the man who was his home when Ian needed him the most. And I may have teared up a bit when they finally loved each other and Ian admitted he had never been loved before. OMG I was SOOOOO happy he was finally loved!


This story was all kinds of holiday sweetness Amy Lane style and I loved every word. I wish this were longer because I fell in love with Ian and Joel and would have loved more of their histories, more of their present lives, and more of their future after they declared their love. I would have loved to see their Christmas celebration together and would have loved to see how they learned to love together. But this story was a great holiday read and I will be visiting it again. Are their plans for an audio version???????
oh and P.S. there was a cat named Manky Bastard who was fabulous and it ripped my heart out when Ian told Joel she passed. And when Many Bitch arrived, I laughed out loud and may have scared my own cat who was sitting on my lap at the time.


If I must on Goodreads
Dreamspinner Press
Amazon US
Amazon UK
Amazon CA
All Romance eBooks

I would like to thank the publisher for providing me with the eARC of this title in exchange for my honest opinion.

Farewell Giveaway
I have a number of paperbacks, most of which are signed, to giveaway. Over the between now (11 Mar 2017) and 31 Mar 2017, every comment on the blog (this post and all other new posts), will be entered to win 1 of these paperbacks. There are also some misc swag items, so there will be a few packs of these to give away as well.

Thank you so much for your support over the last 4 years. Prism will be closing its doors on 1 April 2017. All content will remain available, but no new content will appear after 31 Mar 2017. As such all request forms have been turned off. Again Thank you,

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