Author: Cara Dee
Publisher: Self Published
Cover Artist: Unknown
Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
Publication Date: 04/26/2016
Length: Long Novel (~ 100K+)
Genre: Bisexual, Gay Romance
Have you ever woken up and expected to see destruction everywhere?
In 48 hours, I lost everything. I came home to find my girlfriend of four years with another man. The next day a plane crash ripped my family away from me, shattering me in the process. In many ways, I died that day, too. The fun-loving man who’d lived in the fast lane and loved his career in the film industry was gone. Left was a forty-year-old shell that dwelled at the bottom of a bottle.
Only one person knew what I was going through. My sister’s stepson, who hadn’t been on the plane. Julian knew what it was like to lose everyone he loved, too. He’d stopped showing up at reunions when he was a teenager, so I didn’t know him very well. But I told him at the memorial service he could come out and visit me in LA whenever. One day he did, and I guessed it was as good a day as any to start picking up the pieces and see what was left of us.
This story starts out rough but don’t let that put you off!
It begins with two days from hell –
Day one and Noah returns home from work to find his girlfriend in bed with another man. In their bed and in their home. There is no talking, there is no listening to excuses there is just sadness. Noah throws her out the door and that is the end of it.
Then there is the loss of his family. Almost all his family gone in the blink of an eye. This is way more than sadness – this is raw and debilitating grief. This is soul destroying and something that Noah may not recover from as he buries himself and his life in a bottle. Alcohol brings him the oblivion from reality that he so desperately craves and he basks in this oblivion every day as life goes on around him.
Julian is his nephew by marriage. He is one of the few family members still alive. He didn’t get on that plane, he didn’t die alongside his parents and siblings and he also isn’t coping with his grief. He turns to Noah for help and suddenly Noah has a reason to get out of bed in the morning, a reason to try and carry on with life and a virtual stranger living with him who needs him more than he thought possible.
As the story unfolds we learn about Julian’s secrets – his shame, his guilt his long time crush on Noah that makes things awkward. Julian pushes and Noah runs, he runs due to fear and due to the fact that he feels the same way. They crave each other, they crave touch from another human to assuage their grief and keep the nightmares at bay but the more they touch the more intense the feelings, it’s a vicious cycle that both men want but that terrifies Noah and causes him to back off.
I loved Noah. He is perhaps one of my favourite characters ever. The author really gave us a character that we could understand and grow to love, a character who grew throughout the story and one who as a reader I wanted to cheer on whilst telling him it would be ok. He was thoughtful and passionate and living with a difficult dilemma that was often mostly in his own head but difficult all the same.
The ending of this book was hard earned with a lot of soul searching but it was absolutely perfect. Noah is a book I will be reading again and again.
I would like to thank the publisher for providing me with the eARC of this title in exchange for my honest opinion.
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